Grief and Love
““I honestly don’t think I have ever felt so utterly comfortable and held in a group of people where I didn’t know anyone going into it (possibly even when I did know the other people). THANK YOU” - Kate
“Having grown so used to suffering in silence, Dave’s Grief and Love course has been the first place I’ve felt safe enough to talk about my feelings, experiences and longings. Dave helps us create a space in which such openness feels natural and welcomed, and which brings out the best in everyone present - honesty, courage and compassion, in my case. Being heard and held by the group, with kindness and without judgement, has been a gift I shall treasure” - Tom
“Dave lives a life defined by love, and he has the passion, sensitivity and wisdom to help those he works with find the courage within themselves to do the same ... Dave’s work is unique, beautifully held and essential for these times.” - Jacqueline”
***If you’re interested in taking part in a future Grief and Love course, please contact me for more information. There are as yet no dates in the diary, but I will let you know as soon as that changes***
I could talk for hours about the value and gift of holding space for grief, but for now I'll just say this: from both personal experience and from witnessing others, I have been amazed at how healing and nourishing it is, both to be welcomed in ourselves and to welcome others, whether the grief feels big or small.
By 'grief', I do not just mean sadness caused by a recent bereavement. I mean any emotional experience in response to losing something we love, or fearing we will lose it, or indeed of never having had it. My sense is that as a culture we don't know how to grieve, even though it is so good for us to do so. So whether it is the death of a loved one now or decades ago, or the end of a relationship or job or friendship or a phase of life, or grief about the way of the world, or something you can barely put into words, all of it is welcome. It need not even be the 'end' of any of those: it could be illness, uncertainty, a shift in how someone relates to you: all of these can be felt as losses that ask us to grieve for them. And there is no hierarchy: you don't need to worry about bringing "too much" or "taking the space of someone who needs it more".
The eight-week course
The more I hold grief spaces, the more I feel the deep value of this work and know that it is a huge part of what I want to offer in the world. I also realise how deeply grief and love are intertwined, and the conviction grows in me that if we long for love, then having space to grieve - and to learn how to grieve - is one of the most powerful things we can do. I also realise how much this relies upon a sense of deep safety and welcome, and how much skill and care are required to co-create that.
My eight-week online course holds a space for grief and explores the connections between grief and love. The course starts with a focus on building the container, to understand what it is we need to be able to do this work together. The next two sessions focus on grief and loss, and then as time goes on, explore how this process can help us to open our hearts, both to other people and to love in general.